Progress Over Perfection

When working toward a goal progress is crucial.  Without progress you either stay the same or start to go backward.   Achieving those things that are important to you is all about CONSISTENCY.  Consistency is not about perfection, it’s about progress!!!  I’ve struggled with this for many years and it can be very frustrating and defeating when you realize that you are the reason you do not have the body, the job, the health, etc. that you want.

It is important to ask yourself “Why am I not being consistent in the areas that I say are important to me?”  WARNING: it’s time for a deep dig within yourself :).

Grab your journaling notebook and a pretty pen that you enjoy writing with… maybe even a box of tissues (or a roll of toilet paper :)).

Start with these questions:

Why am I not being consistent in the areas that I say are important to me?

What is getting in my way?

How can I change my schedule or rework my day and week to work in planned time to focus solely on the next step that will move me forward?

What are the benefits that you or others would experience if you took consistent action toward this goal?

Who can help you with this?

Once you have journaled and figured out some steps that will result in progress find an accountability partner.  Maybe it’s your spouse, maybe it’s your best friend and y’all both have a goal of wanting to workout on a regular basis so that you’re healthier and happier with your body.  Do what works for you but make sure this accountability partner will actually help you be more consistent in the actions that will help you reach your goals.  My sister and I joke that we are not good at helping each other achieve our goals because we just want each other to be happy 🙂 “yeah drink that soda”.  🙂  I suggest establishing a weekly call or meeting with your accountability partner so that there is a scheduled time each week to address where you can further improve and just as importantly to celebrate your successes and the progress you made!

Remember Your Dreams Are Within Your Reach!  For more inspiration and to receive updates when my latest blogs are posted, sign up at www.LifeHopes.com/freebie.

 

I’m Not Ready

Where are you in your life right now?  Are you currently unhappy with your job but need it to pay your bills?  Are you a stay at home mom and don’t feel like you have the skills you need to get a job outside the home that you want?  Do you feel like you do not know enough to pursue the path that will lead you to where you want to be?

You’ll probably never feel ready to take the steps to get out of your comfort zone.  To make progress and move toward the life of your dreams, JUST START.  You do not have to take a drastic leap and quit your job tomorrow to pursue your dream full time (I don’t recommend that).  But there are definitely some small steps you can take which have no negative repercussions and will move your closer to your goal and make you feel great about yourself for taking action.  It is much easier to take small steps while you are still working in your job that pays your bills.  Don’t be scared, and don’t let anything stop you from taking steps toward your goals, your dream life!  You owe it to yourself, your family, your friends and those who will be touched/inspired by seeing you move closer to your dream life.

Don’t hold your gifts inside.  Your first step is to “go deep” and figure out what brings you the most joy in your life and where you want to increase the happiness or peace in your life.  After you figure out where you want to make changes, find one small thing you can do to get closer to your ideal life.  Signing up for an Audible membership and listening to podcasts (free) were the small steps I took in the beginning to get me motivated and give me ideas on how to move closer to my dream life.  Sign up to receive more inspiration at LifeHopes.com/freebie.  Reach out to me and let me know your thoughts on this article MindyNHope@gmail.com.

All I Ever Wanted Was Stability

Growing up, my mom was not able to give us financial stability. This resulted in me developing a scarcity mindset. In his Psychology Today article, The Scarcity Mindset, Dr. Shahram Heshmat Ph.D. said “Scarcity orients the mind automatically and powerfully toward unfulfilled needs.” Since there was never enough money to pay all the bills, to fix the car, to buy new clothes, I saw the world as not having enough money. My mom did not have a stable job and when she did have a job, it was not well paying. I saw the reason for our family not having money as a result of my mom not having a stable, well paying job and my goal became to get a job that paid well and that I didn’t have to worry about losing.

In my mind, this would mean I could have a “good” life and be happy. My true dream was to get a 4 year college degree so that I could get a job at a state agency or a large company with a good reputation, where I could work until retirement. I looked forward to getting up every morning, putting on my dressy clothes and going to work in a large office building down town. Just writing this now makes me sad because in reality this was such a small goal, a small dream. I don’t find it inspiring or uplifting.

The positive effect of my scarcity mindset was that it motivated me to go to college and make good grades. I accomplished the four year degree and was blessed to receive a federal job right out of college! It was a great feeling and I was proud of these accomplishments. This job paid well and has given me more experience than I could have ever imagined.

I had accomplished my goal, I had my dream life… or what I had dreamed of as a child. I had stability, a great husband and a “good” income. I was still in my 20s and had surpassed all of my goals. So why was I miserable in my job? I had more financial stability than I ever anticipated and I got to dress up every day and go to work in a big office building. Why did I feel like I wanted to scream when I sat in my cubicle? Because I was not fulfilled in my job which was nearly the biggest part of my life, where I spent most of my time. I was doing a job just to earn a paycheck and that just was not good enough for me. The agency where I worked had a noble mission but I was not working in my strengths and did not have a big enough impact. God had given me gifts and experiences that needed to be shared with others to better the world. God had put me in a job that allowed me to gain the experience and confidence to make a difference and I needed to explore other ways to utilize my gifts.

For true happiness in your life you must search your soul for what is important to you, what makes you happy, why these things are important to you and why those things make you happy. You must design the life of your dreams and set goals to move you closer to those dreams. Your dream life is entirely possible and within your reach. For more insights on life design subscribe to my email list at lifehopes.com.

What Is Life Design?

Life design is about living your life intentionally. When I found myself sitting in a cubicle every day, working to meet a quota, and wanting to scream, I knew I had to make a change. I’m thankful that my discomfort lead me to pursue what God put in my heart, to build others up and help them discover a life of joy and peace by living a more intentional life.

What is Life Design?

  • Searching your soul for what you really want out of life
  • Taking action to follow your dreams
  • NOT SETTLING
  • Conquering fear and doubt
  • Obliterating excuses for why you can’t have the life of your dreams
  • Refusing to accept that you have to work a job where you are miserable just to survive and support your family
  • Setting goals and working toward them
  • Creating a life where you wake up each day and feel excited instead of dread!

Want to know more about life design? Hop on over to https://calendly.com/mindyhope/20-minute-call to set up a time to have a free chat with Mindy Hope, your life design coach. Let’s chat about your dream life!

If You’re Sad and You Know It, Smile

Yes really! We can control how we respond to situations. Our actions can change how we feel. It is hard to believe and sometimes we don’t want to believe it because we like to feel sorry for ourselves but we have to get out of that habit. If you are sad, feeling down, feeling depressed just try to smile. 🙂 I love smiling. As I sit here writing this it makes me smile. It feels funny when you are miserable and you make yourself smile for no reason but just the action of smiling will make you feel at least a little better.

Watch your posture too, when you are feeling bad about yourself for whatever reason, most people tend to slouch. It is like we wish we had a turtle shell and we could just pull our head in and hide. Sitting up straight and holding your head high just makes you feel better. Practice positive self talk while you are doing these things too. Be sure to tell yourself you are beautiful, you are strong, you are worthy and anything else that is positive that you want to remember or come to believe about yourself. This is how we change our negative self-talk and increase our joy.

If you are feeling lazy, guilty or negative and you can’t put your finger on the reason, put on your shoes and go for a walk outside. It doesn’t matter if you have on workout clothes, just going for even a short walk will give you some energy and make you feel better. When I sit at home on the weekend and don’t open the curtains and blinds and just sit around, I usually end up feeling very depressed. When I had my little boy and was home all the time on maternity leave, I was more depressed when I just stayed inside. Don’t get me wrong, depression is a real thing and I have relied on prescription antidepressants (and anxiety medications when needed) to get me through my struggles, but I have found that while my medicine helps me, if I don’t get up and out and do things, I still feel miserable.

Give it a try. When feeling sad, try going for a walk and smiling. Try holding your head high and using good posture. Tell yourself positive things to reinforce your personal strength and well-being.

The Only Way Out Is Through

Robert Frost is quoted as saying “The only way out is through”. Fear is what keeps people from doing most things that will move them closer to the life they truly desire. The only way out is through is a fantastic reminder that you can’t completely avoid fear. When you are stuck in the throws of fear, push forward, keep moving and eventually you will move through the fear.

Fear is a survival instinct that was very much relevant to humans in the past, however is not nearly as integral to our survival in today’s world. Quite the opposite, now fear prevents us from living. Many of us are conditioned to completely avoid anything perceived as risky, untraditional, or out of the ordinary. Where does that get us? Spending years doing things we do not like, feeling miserable, overeating to comfort the emptiness we feel in life, etc. That is not how God intended us to live. If we are not using our God-given strengths and talents, not following the desires of our heart, we are not serving this beautiful world we live in.

You must believe in yourself and move past fear to create the life you desire. Fear regret more than fearing failure! You have the capacity to create the life you desire.

Mindy Hope
Your Life Design Coach

Want More Time With Your Kids?

Do you miss your kids because you work full time?

Feel guilty because your kids are in daycare all day?
Try this! Think about what you would do with the extra time with your kids.
I’m a pen and paper kinda girl so I would write down some of those ideas. 🙂

Now think about how you can get the time you desire.

Do you need to look at other income or lifestyle options?
Think outside the box. You can create the life that you dream of!
Your possibilities are greater than you think but you have to change your mindset first.
Don’t think of why you can’t have the time with your kids that you want.
Instead, think of how you can get the time with your kids that you want.
Believe in yourself and your dream life.
Begin taking actions, even small actions, to get you closer to where you want to be.

 

Be ruthless with your time and commitments.

 

4 ways to immediately increase/enhance the time you have with your kids

 

I know this isn’t easy for everyone and I’ve had to practice but I’m improving.  You must be ruthless with your time and commitments.  Here are 4 ways to take control.

    1. You must stop allowing your time and energy to be wasted on the things that are not
      most important to you.
    2. Do only those things that are essential.
    3. Spend the extra time doing what you really want to do, what brings you joy and makes you feel happy and peaceful.
    4. Allow yourself the guilt-free enjoyment of true quality time with your kids. For me, my ideal is taking my son (2 years old) to the zoo and having a relaxing time walking/running around the zoo with my time and attention devoted totally to him.

While I daydream about doing these myself, I rarely get around to all of them… but I have given myself the time and space to stay home with my son on the weekends and not make any commitments most weekends. My husband works 2 weekends out of the month and I know those weekends exhaust me.  So, for at least one of those weekends, my little guy and I stay home and do whatever we want.  I no longer feel bad about it. It is WONDERFUL!!! He and I both really enjoy these relaxing weekends where we are both comfortable and not stressed out by rushing to places. We will walk to the backyard for a little while and/or play with trucks and sticks on the deck. It’s not the zoo but its special time together and I think he enjoys it just as much!

 

I feel guilty…

 

My biggest concern to spending quiet, relaxing time at home on the weekends is that I feel guilty that we aren’t going to see or host my aging grandparents who live less than an hour away. You have to give yourself the permission to not take responsibility for other’s happiness. I love my grandparents dearly. I’m so grateful to still have the opportunity to visit with them and I’m grateful for all they have done for me and our family. I feel good about the visits we do have, but I also feel good about allowing myself the guilt-free quality time with my son. He deserves that downtime and it allows me to be much more of the mom and wife… the woman that I want to be.

Mindy

VISION, Palmetto Center for Change, West Columbia

Click here to register through EventBrite.

Turn daily demands and discouragement into a more intentional path.  This 3 hour workshop is designed for women who have become overwhelmed with the demands of a busy life and are losing sight of how to live a fulfilled life.

The cost is $15.  All supplies are included and you will walk away with a vision board full of images of the life of your dreams, let’s call it art therapy.  Light refreshments will also be available. Come out for a fun morning of cutting and pasting pictures that represent the life you want!  Our subconscious minds have incredible power over us.  Having a visual to remind you of your goals and what matters most to you will help keep you on track to achieve the life of your dreams!

VISION: Turn Daily Demands And Discouragement Into A More Intentional Path

VISION workshop

Turn daily demands and discouragement into a more intentional path.

Are you feeling overwhelmed?  Are the demands of a busy life putting a shadow on living a fulfilled life? It’s time to bring your beautiful mess, relax, let your hair down, and rediscover the joys that once inspired you. Join Mindy Hope on a fun, yet powerful journey that will inspire and motivate you to dream. Learn to understand your roadblocks and visualize the life you want. By the end of this interactive workshop, you’ll walk away with a mental boost of inspiration and a motivational toolbox to keep you on track.  You CAN achieve your goals.  You CAN bring more positivity to your life. You CAN have a fulfilling and happy life.  It just takes a little VISION to get there.

 

Want to be a part of our next Vision Workshop?

Click our Workshop Calendar to find a workshop near you and register today!